Great team leaders posses the excellent skill of initiating attitudes of connectedness and acceptance.  And it may seem appropriate for them to do so because they hold a position of authority, but this skill should not be exclusive to the people in “leadership”.

Affirm Me Please

Everyone who has a healthy perspective of relationships, values affirmation.  Affirmation is a great way to feel connected and accepted.  But feeling appreciated and affirmed in your work environment and relationships may be found in the wrong ways or to a lesser degree than you would like.  A pay check isn’t the only expression of affirmation and sometimes pay day feels like the furthest thing from feeling accomplishment and connectedness in your team environment.

Asking your co-workers and collaborators for the opportunity to share with them an idea you have for team success can provide you with the benefits of a team attitude of thankfulness.

Share your intention to build team connectedness and energy, then ask if the team has similar thoughts and would like to try that out.  Not everyone likes verbal attention so some may want to send an email or write on the board.

You may encounter defensive attitudes if you have not achieved the best start-up or used the best sentence composition.  Or, defensiveness may quite possibly have nothing to do with you.  Nonetheless, let the team visioning be natural and not “forced”.

Check Your Motives & Personal Responsibility

Be careful how and when you ask.  Obviously, do not ask during anger.  And be sure to make yourself aware of ways that you may have overlooked or missed out on hearing the affirmation of others.  Ultimately, each of us is solely responsible for feeling validated and in control of our feelings.


Nothing anyone says or does to you will take away your ability to be in control of your perceptions and feelings.  You are responsible for your attitudes and feelings.


Not everyone will feel comfortable right away and it takes time spent to build trust.  The common understanding that you value each member and the opportunities in contributing to the team will ensure the safety of communicating affirmations.  Also, there is an adjustment period when a new system of communication is suggested or introduced.  Be patient and careful.


A good way to initiate team connectedness and energizing affirmation is to ask your team what their vision for their roles in the project are.  Another sure fire win is to ask what motivates them.  Be sure to communicate your intentions, but not forcefully.

Initiate The Change You Would Like to Experience

A goal you can set in order to fulfill your personal desire to be connected and accepted is to be an initiator of positive feedback.  In addition to building a healthy team environment, utilizing our innate social connectivity by giving affirmation and giving positive feedback is a great way to stimulate creative flow.


Simply telling your team member that you appreciated their compliment or feedback is a great way to keep affirmation going.  Affirming their action as an example for the type of team environment that you would like to build and maintain is a great way to communicate your desire for well-connected and energized team.  Nonetheless, share the credit freely and take initiative to let someone know that you appreciate what they do.  It can be as easy as pressing the “like” button!



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